It Is A Custom, After All ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Today am going to tell you a story. It’s from the time when I was within this Endocrine team and I would function like my boss’s assistant and sit through the patient consultations, take notes and explain the conversation in simple language to the patients later and so on. When I wasn’t assisting him, I’d work as a dietitian and diabetes educator.

This doc had a charming way of making small talk with patients to put them at ease. But the thing that would most catch my attention is how he’d remember details of the conversation and even make notes – to use it at just the right time to drive home a point. Like, spot on timing!

That day, we were seeing a man with diabetes who had come in with his wife. That particular day being a festival, my boss asked the lady if her husband had bought her any new saree. And she replied how he had bought one last month for her birthday and therefore, he gave this festival saree a skip.

We were seeing the man that day as he had injured his feet upon walking bare feet on a recent temple visit. So, understandably my boss was upset that such a well-informed man had gotten himself into this horrible mess – which was entirely avoidable in the first place.

And the doc went on pointing how this patient had received several sessions of diabetes education from me, and how I had already given him instructions on how to handle different situations as a diabetic – low sugar, foot care, eating out, adjusting insulin and so much more.

Thank goodness I had made my notes for all that I had covered in my sessions! The man who was quiet the entire time now said to the doc – “I could have very well walked with my shoes in the park next to temple, all the while chanting my prayers.Am sure the gods would be happy. But I wouldn’t be. Customs, you see! Just how do I give up the custom of doing pradakshina, please tell me!!”

My mouth fell open upon hearing how this man did not think anything of his diabetes. And for him to have walked bare feet around the temple doing a pradakshina in the hot summer sun, all in the name of custom?? I was stunned.

My boss turned to the man’s wife, looking her straight in the eye he said, “it is absolutely a custom that he must buy you a new saree for Gowri habba ( festival of the day). So what if he bought one for your birthday last week! Oh and! Make sure it’s a festive silk one – not a paisa less than 25,000 Rupees. And definitely remember to get one each for Dasara and Deepavali too. It is absolutely customary to do that.”

Both of us ladies gleefully laughed! The husband was stumped. And my boss had delivered the lesson perfectly, along with a dash of humor.

I remember this story especially around festival times, when people tell me ‘oh Girija, I just had to make milk payasam or ghee something-else and have it as a family .. after all our customs no!’

I think it was the great George Bernard Shaw  who once said – am paraphrasing, in the name of custom, one can get away with any atrocity. True, isn’t it?

Now my dear reader, will you take ten minutes to reflect and see what absurd things you may be doing in the name of custom?

“How The Hell Should I Celebrate If Am Not Eating Paneer, No booze, No This Or That??”

No objects were hurled at anybody and nobody was injured in this discussion – just saying! 🙂

Hi lovely reader,

I get to have some absolutely wonderful, deep and meaningful conversations with women as part of the work I do. Just can’t tell you how grateful I feel for the wisdom I glean from all this.

So, today I’ll give you a peek inside one of those totally eye-opening exchanges I had last week.

Them: G, my brother and I would have to share a cup of milk when we were growing up. My mother would say to us – “when you grow up, get rich enough to each have a full cup of milk, each eat a whole boiled egg. And eat your rotis with butter! But for now, this is all there is kids”

G: hmm

Them: And now, I am rich – I can have a whole cup of milk as many times I want, eat as many eggs as I like and Persis (their very trusted house-help) makes the best rotis, but I had brown bread delivered! And white butter, too!! And here, you’re saying this is bad, that is bad ..

G: hmm .. I only said what science says about it ..

Them: wohi baat hai – all same! After all this struggle to grow up, study, earn – why?? When I can’t even have butter on my bread, what is the use! How to celebrate?? No paneer, no butter, no booze, no non-veg – nothing!

My friend, have you wondered about this anytime -about how, more of something isn’t necessarily better by default?

No matter how much money we make, our bodies process only those foods it is meant to process;

No matter how rich we become, our stomach can still only hold so much food that it is meant to handle.

We can still only wear ONE saree at a time!

When we go from very very humble situation of very little food to eat and very few clothes to wear, it is reasonable to desire and have goals of having more of these things. A little more than what we need with some more to spare. Such that, it is not a hand to mouth existence.

But! If we don’t pay attention to our inner talk, go go go – hustle hustle hustle mentality can land us in deep trouble. We tend to forget that we are still the same species with same kinda simple bodily requirements even though we may have advanced in the socioeconomic sense.

The question is not how much paneer or meat or milk or booze you can afford. The question must be, does your body require paneer or meat or milk or meat – and if yes, how much can it afford to process safely .. isn’t it!

It was such an enlightening session for  both of us, that for me personally I had take some quiet time to reflect upon it, most of last week.

More money = more milk, more meat, more booze = more happiness? No!

Beyond a point, more of anything doesn’t lead to greater happiness or contentment by default. If we’re especially talking about food, it requires deliberate effort to use the money wisely and appropriately so that the food we consume brings us the joy of good health.

Often, we need to spend money to free up time so we can eat, sleep and move our bodies – some required activities that cannot be outsourced!

So, I request you to give this some quiet time and think through – 2020 is approaching fast. Make sure you have some clarity around this so that, 2020 can be your best year yet!

Love,
g

They Wanted Vada Pav For Comfort .. Here’s What I Gave Them

Dear reader, isn’t it fascinating how we carry our childhood memories of specific comfort food!  Speaking one’s mother tongue, serving someone their comfort food must be two definite ways of taking friendship to the next level with people.

But sometimes, people tend to develop unexplained deep liking for something they’ve only just seen or experienced. So much so that it baffles the person feeling it. I feel fortunate to see and meet people here who feel this way about India and Indian food.

“How did I live all these years without this?”, they said of vada pav 🙂

The genuine warmth of the chaat person serving it, the vibrant bustle of  Mumbai and it’s sweet everyday people – they were smitten by it all! And they wondered if I could make some … at 9 pm in the night!

At any time of the day (or night) I don’t deep fry stuff in my house ..  but didn’t have the heart to say it out loud to them. And I wasn’t going to relax this small but absolutely critical rule I’ve made for myself about 8-9 years ago.

So here’s what I came up with. And DELIGHTED report it was a huge hit.

I don’t have pictures the final of the final product, as it got eaten up right away .. but you’ll definitely get the point – so here we go!

Step 1 – Warm a lavash bread on the tava

 

Step 2 – Place the alu sabji and garlic chutney as seen in the picture

 

Step 3 – Roll it tightly as seen in the third picture

I’ve no pictures from this point onward –

Step 4 – Cut the roll into 1 inch rounds

Step 5 – Roast the alu exposed sides of the roll on the tava until it turns a crispy golden brown

Step 6 – Serve with green and red chutney, plus tomato ketchup or sauce

It comes very close to the real thing MINUS all the evil of oil and deep frying. And that, in my books is a huge PLUS!

You know lovely reader, food must feel good long after you’ve eaten it. Isn’t it? What’s the point in eating something if it’s going to make you feel guilty and miserable ten minutes after??

Well, that’s my yardstick for saying yes (or no!) to anything in life.

On that note, Jai ho to desi food  ❤️

Phir milenge!
g

Oh Thanks To The Hot Chic Waiter Girl, Venky Went Red!

Hi my dear reader,

These days I love coming to vacation rentals with a kitchenette as opposed to a hotel room. Being equipped for an opportunity to cook your own food – should the inspiration strike – isn’t something I’d want to miss.

That is especially true for me in a plant paradise place like Maui! The sheer variety and access to farm fresh harvest is like no other in an agriculture dominated state like Hawaii.

All that said, first three days of being here we ate at a restaurant. We had signed up for a bunch of other activities. One of which was to spend a day deep in the forest area, where a nearby local farming family catered to our food needs.

We were excited about our find of this eating joint, and ordered our salad. Five minutes later, our sweet young waiter served a plate and I said to my husband, “we can share this, baby .. the second plate must come soon”.

Waiter girl was little surprised  “you meant two plates, right??” I confirmed no, two salads and went back to conversation with my husband.

The second day we were at another restaurant and we asked for a salad. Same response – hey we wanted to check if you meant two plates or two salads. No error, two salads I said.

The third day was the best! 😂

We went to this place called Flatbread Company for my husband’s birthday lunch. As usual we ordered two salads. And one pizza – thin crust, only veg, no cheese – after ten minutes, I added.

Five minutes went by and our lovely waitress comes by and asks -” did you really want two salads? Our servings are big, just so you know” .. I said yes and smiled. And then, very spontaneously she said, ” and you want a veggie pizza ten minutes after that??”

Oh dear! 😂😂😂

The and word and the tone of surprise 😂 Venky was red by this time!

I gave her a chuckle and said “yes and yes” 😂 and sensed our conversation wouldn’t resume until after I had enlivened Venky .. and had to come up with something. And I spontaneously said – “What guy wouldn’t want to be memorable to a hot chic! Trust me she’ll remember you as the sweet guy who wolfed down a salad and followed it with a pizza!”

And our man was laughing and smiling .. all was well again.

I secretly ordered a beautiful macadamia nut torte with pineapples to end the meal.

My dear reader, whether it’s a guy or a girl eating huge salads in front of crowds does make others feel awkward. They feel that way because they know they themselves aren’t doing it. And they _are_ supposed to be doing it!

So, often they will convey their own awkwardness by way of surprise. Our waiter ladies in all three situations may not have felt the slightest awkwardness themselves. They may have purely asked for clarity of the order.

But if you’re a big salad eater or want to become one, you must learn to handle such situations with feeling offended or embarrassed. Often, you will still feel bashful – like how Venky did – even after years of being this way. That doesn’t go away at all. And you’ve got to learn to take it in your stride.

Plus, you’ve to remind yourself that vegetable and fruit are extremely low in calories when cooked right. So, one needs to eat a fair quantity to feel satiated. And one can afford to take in big helpings as well, without worrying about gaining weight.

Life lessons come anywhere anytime .. no!

I’ll catch up with you soon, am going away on a farm tour after this email .. here are some salad pictures for your inspiration.

 

 

 

Love,
g

Want Freedom From Procrastination?

Firstly, happy Independence Day!

On most special days, holidays and weekends – pretty much on all the days when I can laze back in bed for an extra ten minutes – I ask myself ‘how can I stop being lazy’ 😂

10 on 10 for the irony of it all!

Looks like am not alone at all.

Someone recently was saying to me ‘Girija, if I am so smart why can’t I get this crap done once and for all??’

They are trying to lose 20 kilos.

And another friend was saying of her cousin, ‘I dunno why she drinks so much – she’s way too intelligent for that’.

And apparently in both cases they are saying – ‘yeah yeah, we’ll get to it one of these days’

Familiar huh?

I know I do it all the time! All I’ve control over is, to do less of it .. that’s all.

What it is that you are procrastinating doesn’t matter – whether it is starting to eat healthy or learning some skill, or whatever it is, the dynamic of procrastination is the same.

When you sense that other people’s assessment of you is much higher than your own assessment of your talent or skill to get that specific job done, you will not like to risk losing your value in their eyes.

Therefore, in running the cost – benefit analysis of things (our brains are always running cost – benefit analysis on everything), your brain will decide it is much better to not ruin that false but favorable assessment of the world (she’s way too intelligent) or sometimes it could be your own self-assessment albeit a distorted one (I am so smart) about your “talent”.  And therefore it decides that it is wise to indefinitely postpone doing or even starting the damn thing!

This is what we call the ego trap in evolutionary psychology circles. And this is exactly what you must learn to recognize and choose to take the counter-intuitive step if you want true and lasting freedom from procrastination.

Ask me why.

It’s because, that is where your opportunity to earn the precious self-esteem lies hidden!

Love,
g

What Two Of My Fav Writers Say About Tracking

Depending on where in the world you are, it’s the last day of July.

Already??

Phew!

Yes. It just flew by us, no? All of July I discussed Leela’s story with you. Even in bits and pieces it gave you a glimpse of how tracking is a useful habit. Today, I’ll share with you two of my favorite writers/influencers and their insight on the topic of tracking.

My lovely friend, whether you’re learning to add a salad to your meals, trying to lose some weight or looking to fit in some exercises into your routine – you just got to track whatever it is that you are doing. And then, in very small increments steadily improve upon the metrics.

See what this eminent surgeon and author Atul Gawande  and productivity expert James Clear say about tracking.

Today, take a 30 minute-break to be by yourself.

Just you .. with your thoughts, notebook and pencil. Tomorrow is the beginning of a new month. Ask yourself what you’d like to accomplish – it doesn’t have to be some mega big ambition. Even that desire to wake up 10 minutes earlier is a valid goal to go after. You know, 5 months is a l-o-n-g time to get stuff done. Okay, at least long enough to get it started and get some traction.

You can’t ask for better mentors than Atul Gawande and James Clear for what you’re setting out to do, dear reader. Hope you’ll check these links out.

Warmly,
g

A Topic So Important That I Want To Write About It All Year!

Hi lovely reader!

Welcome to July! Half the year is already behind us, huh?!

Another way to look at it is – half the year is still ahead of us, for all that we’ve planned to accomplish before 2019 ends.

So, how do you do it?

I don’t know if you’ve ever used this magic habit – tracking.

Common habit of the successful folks

I’ve taken courses and studied a variety of topics under some really uber cool people like Ramit Sethi, Todd Herman, Marie Forleo, Amy Porterfield  and so many more .. tracking IS NOT OPTIONAL when you work/learn with these folks.

I can CONFIDENTLY say this one thing I learnt, my friend – NOT tracking your progress is a serious mistake – whether it is with food, weight loss, money, dating – whatever it may be, that you are trying to get better at, you.must.track!

Struggle #1 that everyone deals with

For all this month of July, let’s take the example of one of my wonderful clients who goes by the fictitious name of Leela and I’ll guide you to learn some key lessons in tracking.

If you remember her story from last week, life put her in a situation where she had to make a 180 degree turn with respect to food. And we had budget constraints for whatever we were going to do, especially because of the heavy medical expenses she was taking care of.

So, I asked her to please give me a list of A-L-L the edible items currently in her kitchen. Oh my goodness – the struggle #1 showed up like crazy: DENIAL. After much back and forth, and immense resistance she sent me this ‘sterile’ list – now looking back, even she laughs about it!

This is what denial looks like

Next week when I share with you all that she DID NOT include in the list, you will see even more clearly what denial was all about 🙂

But for now, see the list she sent – she even sent the prices of things (I had never asked for it!) .. this is how we all distract ourselves 🙂

rice –  120 x 15

idli rice – 115 x 4

t dhal – 180 x 6

u dhal – 180 x 6

g gram – 185 x 1

c dhal – 145 x 1

g nut – 140 / 0.5 kg

kabuli c 140/0.5

To be continued.

Mastering Food Budget – A Client Story

I’ve a story for you today! Grab a chair have a read … the aha moment is just beautiful.

Background:

This client of mine, let’s call her Leela. She lives with her husband and two kids and two sets of parents just steps away from her own place. A young mother herself, she was doing a fabulous job of being there for the two sets of elderly parents, balancing the social dynamics and all with admirable poise. Every now and then, she would think of buying this or that as a way of adding to her convenience – for instance, chopped onions, peeled garlic or washed cauliflower ready to use – and she would say – ‘oh this, I can’t fit in Girija .. it costs extra and it adds up’

Crisis:

And then, some health issue flared up requiring her to reconsider anything and everything she would put in her mouth. With this, her fastidious attention to balancing their family budget took a new level of intensity.

Silver lining:

This happens with every single one of us.

Think back to the times when –

you have just 30 days to go before the exam, and you have that many chapters in this many subjects to revise .. when you feel you are already resourceful, and you are faced with constraints – you learn a whole new way of looking at things. That is to say, your definition of resourcefulness goes up by a few notches! This exact thing happened with Leela, too.

Crescendo:

Suddenly the situation was that, she had to eat organic veggies and fruits as much as she could. She had to switch to non dairy milk and curd. She had to bring in outside help for the kitchen. And she just had to stretch that budget and make it work! The health issues have a way of bringing urgency like nothing else does, in life.

Teaching moment:

Leela is one of the most intelligent and sensitive people I know. I just have to hint at something and she gets super creative and goes to town with it all by herself!

I remember sharing a leaf off of my own life and saying, “Leela, I became friends with one really wealthy lady at my art class. Those were the days just after my wedding and everything about running the house was new to me.

My friend and I were window shopping and it was 2nd or 3rd of July as I remember it. And there were attractive sales everywhere we looked. She finally picked up a beautiful vase and had the florist next door put together the MOST amazing bouquet using some of the best blossoms. It looked HEAVENLY.

And she had quietly said to me – the best part is that it is totally guilt free spending. I had gotten curious about what she meant and asked. That chat with her that followed my asking, profoundly changed my life.”

Changes I made following that chat with my wealthy friend:

When the salary comes in – set it up such that savings portion is taken away even before I can lay my hand on the spending portion of the money.

When I sit for breakfast – I finish eating my day’s quota of vegetables before I put anything else in my mouth.

When we go out to eat – I tell them to box away half the amount in the take away box even before they bring my other half to eat.

When I wake up – I make the bed and fold the blankets so that I’m not tempted to back and curl up again.

So different compared to what I had seen and known:

I had only seen people do it the opposite way – at 7 pm in the evening, they’d remember how they haven’t had water all day and guzzle a whole jug. Half way through dinner, they’d remember salad and eat some – begrudgingly. Exercising, money saving, doing homework in time – almost always was some version of ‘oh-I-should-have’

Aha moment:

After listening my own story, she instantly identified what she could do differently and she chuckled – “aiyyo Giri, I am buying cream biscuits and namkeens ahead of buying rice and vegetables!”

Leela has promised to send in her new take on the family budget and I’ll be sure to share it with you, {!firstname_fix}! She has done a stellar job of it.

And for you my friend, my reminder is this: pay yourself first – whether it is time, money, love or energy – first pay for what matters to you, don’t ever make it an afterthought.

Love,
g

Flop Stories. And Lessons Only They Can Teach

My lovely reader,

Week after week, when you read my posts about inner work, beliefs, transcending cravings yeh woh – it may very likely give you a picture of everything being ultra organized smooth sailing perfection on the other side of the weekly email.

Oooh! I wish I could show you my picture as I write this, my friend – an entire day of work that hasn’t gone well, more drafts than I care to admit that just did not feel right and recipe video that I could not edit for the life of me! Am irked and sleepy. And I had nothing to write to you or put on the blog post. I want to hide under the table and not come out ever again!

And! I found it impossible to sleep without writing something to you. What would I say to my coach and mastermind group – that I chickened out?? I’d rather own it to you! So, sit down – let’s chat 🙂

This is the ugly underbelly of commitment, my dear reader . It stretches you, and it clobbers you to doing what you’ve promised. Even when no one is seeing, that person inside is always looking!

Whether it’s writing a blog post or eating vegetables at every meal, commitment to doing it consistently – against all odds, no matter what – can and does feel like it totally sucks the energy out of you.

It is normal for one to sometimes wonder what the hell am I putting myself through. The trick however is to feel that and yet do what needs to be done. You gotta own the suck-y feeling and do the best you can. It doesn’t have to be perfect. But it better be earnest!

The messiness of life is universal, my lovely reader. So, that’s no excuse. And like my coach says, we gotta decide which one we’ll keep – excuses? Or results? Because, there’s room for just one of them!

Lots of love until next time!
g

A Habit That Keeps You From Reaching Your Goals

I’m going to share a little story about myself – all real – to illustrate a point about eating healthy and dieting. More precisely, it’s about one of the top three reasons why women fail to realize their healthy eating and weight loss goals. So, here we go –

For the last three or so years, I’ve gotten curious about botanical fragrances. This interest has taken me to places where I could meet with people that distill essential oils as a hobby, people that blend heavenly perfumes out of foraged plant material, smell essential oils at flower shows and other plant-centered events. It brings me great joy to connect with folks that are primarily into caring for the plants and our earth.

One thing led to another and I was now dabbling with blending my own botanical perfumes for fun, as a hobby. And recently, I found myself wanting to study more with a seasoned fragrance artist (look up Roxanna Villa if it interests you) and take courses. If you know anything about essential oils, they are precious precious plant offerings – which is reflected in their prices. It is not anything that one can simply goof away with! And therefore, I was bogged down with ‘why am I wanting to study this out of blue?? who am I to become some fragrance artist?’

This is exactly the kind of self-doubt that stops so so many women from working on themselves. And I wanted you to know and seefrom my own example – that it happens with every single one of us! What’s worse, these self-deceiving thoughts that hold us back from doing things we’re so meant to do, sound perfectly legit and reasonable. And when done often enough, they become a habit!

Here are some statements that I get to hear from my people all the time –

“Girija, I need to start watching what I eat. I’ve fallen off the track too bad! But things at work are terribly busy for the next 3 months. Am drowning in my project related work”

“G, I’ve been meaning to call you and set an appointment. My aged in-laws are visiting and can’t tell you how occupied I’ve become! And it’s not even like they’re bedridden or anything. But people, visitors .. oh dear, am full!”

“I can’t do such strict things around food ya Girija. Others may do it fine, but I can’t make time for all the effort it takes to eat salads.”

This time I had to navigate my own self out of a similar self-defeating mess. Trust me, it took a while to recognize that about my own thoughts – like I was saying earlier, the thoughts were totally rational. But it all magically cleared up when I asked myself how I’d handle it if one of my clients or friends were in a situation like mine.

Taking the course with my fragrance artist teacher would give me the clarity as to what I’d do with that knowledge and experience .. and not the other way around. It’s always taking action that gives you direction and clarity.

Within minutes after this dawned on me, plans were made and class seat, hotel room and tickets were all booked. I still felt somewhat shaky and anxious but deep in my heart it just felt like I had done the right thing for me.

Whether it is eating healthy, getting back on track with something or taking that class – merely thinking about it and waiting for a feeling of readiness to fall from skies, doesn’t advance you at all – it will only keep you spinning wheels in the mud.

And now that am back from taking the class, I can’t explain how good it all feels. I don’t yet know what am going to do with it all yet but am so relieved to have just done it! In listening to my story, I hope you’re encouraged to take stock and see if there are any banish self-doubting thoughts lingering in there and take action too 🙂

 

 

 

If You Can Hold A-n-y Belief, Why Hold A Useless One??

“Money is the root of all evil!”

“Men don’t find slender women attractive!”

“True love comes only to a lucky few!”

“Only women with zero ambition choose to stay home!”

“Coaching is for lazy people who can’t figure things out on their own!”

“Who the hell goes to a class to learn how to eat? Or how to breathe?!”

There! I’ve shared half a dozen examples of useless beliefs. And I’ve so many more that are tumbling out from my memory. These are very real examples of limiting and useless beliefs that I’ve seen people carry – like they’re absolutely legit. They felt like it was only a dimwit who’d question it.

When does a belief become useless, you may be wondering. Any unexamined belief especially the ones that stand in the way of what you want for yourself is likely a useless belief. If you’re someone that desires to accumulate some money, with a belief such as ‘money is the root of all evil’ you will not be able to hold on to any money for a long enough time – whether you’ve slogged for it or it was generously given to you. So, the belief is a useless one for you to carry, as it is blocking the very thing you desire to have.

Women do the eye roll and give me duh kinda response, when I say this. I know I’ve done the exact same thing with my mentors! But these beliefs aren’t very visible unless you look for them. You’ll get a hint of their being active if only you tune in to the things you speak, and the words you use. And of course, the results you currently have are a dead giveaway.

Think of it, for instance if you ardently believed that that there’s no point trying to lose weight – as you’re going to be chubby anyway since everybody in the family is plus size too – why would your intelligent brain let you waste your precious time and and energy over learning to shed it?? The towering belief that ‘I am just like others in my family’ will lead you to implicitly be and do everything the way your family has always done – cook a certain way, eat in a particular manner and so on. And sadly, you’d have failed at something without even trying.

I’ll leave you with what Dr.Bruce Lipton has said on this topic –  “human beings have a great capacity for sticking to false beliefs with great passion and tenacity .. people need to realize that their thoughts are more primary than their genes, because the environment, which is influenced by our thoughts* controls the genes”

I have a very tough ask of you … ask yourself what thoughts are you stubbornly holding on to and get curious about them. Just tease yourself and ask ‘what if this isn’t true’ and come up with a contrasting argument for your own original argument. Since you’re doing it in the absolute privacy of your mind (or a journal, utmost) you don’t have to worry about losing face – it’s going to be safe. Oh why, it may even save you a ton of pain, who knows!

* A belief is only a thought that you think often.

Keyboard Shortcut Equivalent For Your Brain – When They’re Great And When They Aren’t!

Today, I’d like to draw your attention to another thing that we all do when it comes to our beliefs. No matter what you believe, you can find evidence to prove that _your_ belief is the right one!

This may feel crazy to you, but your brain has this reflexive mechanism built into it such that it is constantly looking out for evidence to make your existing beliefs feel right.

Now, I don’t want to paint a horrible picture of what is one of the most useful features of human brain. This reflexive mechanism I just discussed or cognitive biases as they’re also called, are like keyboard shortcuts on our computers. They simplify routine learning and perception.

But you must guard against these processes becoming your default mechanisms! As if you’re staying loyal to prior belief systems and thoughts just so your brain doesn’t have to “waste energy” looking for new ones – this is self-destructive. And self-deceptive.

Self-deception by way of unexamined faulty thinking is no different than any other buffer that you may be resorting to – food, work, busyness and what have you – to avoid addressing the real issues in plain sight.

Remember, that’s what we discussed last week – your brain has this exact tendency.
See how Warren Buffet nails it when he says this –

“What the human being is best at doing is interpreting all new information so that their prior conclusions remain intact.”

As if this weren’t enough already, your brain has an affinity to any belief that feeds its pleasure seeking and pain avoiding tendencies. And you know what, more often than not you are clueless about any of these tendencies that are always in operation!

By the way, thank you if you’re one of those that wrote in, about your beliefs. I’d like for you to first reflect and then share with me – what steps would you take to avoid default thinking?