A Habit That Keeps You From Reaching Your Goals

I’m going to share a little story about myself – all real – to illustrate a point about eating healthy and dieting. More precisely, it’s about one of the top three reasons women fail to realize their healthy eating and weight loss goals. So, here we go –

For the last three or so years, I’ve gotten curious about botanical fragrances. This interest has taken me to places where I could meet with people that distill essential oils as a hobby, blend heavenly perfumes out of foraged plant material, smell essential oils at flower shows, and plant-centered events. It brings me great joy to connect with folks primarily into caring for the plants and our earth.

One thing led to another, and I was now dabbling with blending my botanical perfumes for fun, as a hobby. I recently found myself wanting to study more with a seasoned fragrance artist (look up Roxanna Villa if it interests you) and take courses. If you know anything about essential oils, they are precious, precious plant offerings, reflected in their prices. It is not anything that one can simply goof away with! And therefore, I was bogged down with ‘why do I want to study this out of the blue?? who am I to become some fragrance artist?’

This is precisely the kind of self-doubt that stops so so many women from working on themselves. And I wanted you to know and see – from my own example – that it happens with every one of us! What’s worse, these self-deceiving thoughts that hold us back from doing things we’re so meant to do sound perfectly legit and reasonable. And when done often enough, they become a habit!

Here are some statements that I get to hear from my people all the time –

“Girija, I need to start watching what I eat. I’ve fallen off the track too bad! But things at work are busy for the next three months. I am drowning in my project related work.”

“G, I’ve meant to call you and set an appointment. My aged in-laws are visiting and can’t tell you how occupied I’ve become! And it’s not even like they’re bedridden or anything. But people, visitors ..! Oh, dear, I am full!”

“I can’t do such strict things around food ya Girija. Others may do it fine, but I can’t make time for all the effort it takes to eat salads.”

This time I had to navigate my self out of a similar self-defeating mess. Trust me. It took a while to recognize that about my thoughts – like I was saying earlier, the thoughts were rational. But it all magically cleared up when I asked myself how I’d handle it if one of my clients or friends were in a situation like mine.

Taking the course with my fragrance artist-teacher would give me the clarity as to what I’d do with that knowledge and experience. And not the other way around. It’s always taking action that gives you direction and clarity.

Within minutes after this dawned on me, plans were made, and a class seat, hotel room, and tickets were all booked. I still felt somewhat shaky and anxious, but deep in my heart, I felt like I had done the right thing for me.

Whether it is eating healthy, getting back on track with something or taking that class – merely thinking about it and waiting for a feeling of readiness to fall from skies, doesn’t advance you at all – it will only keep you spinning wheels in the mud.

And now that I am back from taking the class, I can’t explain how good it all feels. I don’t yet know what I am going to do with it all yet, but I am so relieved to have just done it! In listening to my story, I hope you’re encouraged to take stock and see if there are any banish self-doubting thoughts lingering in there and take action too 



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