Firstly, happy Independence Day!
On most special days, holidays, and weekends – pretty much on all the days when I can laze back in bed for an extra ten minutes – I ask myself, ‘how can I stop being lazy.’ 😂
Ten on ten for the irony of it all!
It looks like I am not alone at all.
Someone recently said to me, ‘Girija, if I am so smart, why can’t I get this crap done once and for all??’
They are trying to lose 20 kilos.
And another friend said of her cousin, ‘I dunno why she drinks so much – she’s way too intelligent for that.’
In both cases, they are saying – ‘yeah yeah, we’ll get to it one of these days’
I know I do it all the time! All I’ve control over is, to do less of it, that’s all.
What it is that you are procrastinating doesn’t matter – whether it is starting to eat healthily or learning some skill, or whatever it is, the dynamic of procrastination is the same.
When you sense that other people’s assessment of you is much higher than your evaluation of your talent or skill to get that specific job done, you will not like to risk losing your value in their eyes.
Therefore, in running the cost-benefit analysis of things, your brain will decide it is much better not to ruin that false but favorable assessment of the world (she’s way too intelligent). And our brains are always running cost-benefit analysis on everything. Or sometimes it could be your self-assessment albeit a distorted one (I am so smart) about your “talent.” And therefore, it decides that it is wise to postpone doing or even starting the damn thing indefinitely!
This is what we call the ego trap in evolutionary psychology circles. And this is precisely what you must learn to recognize and choose to take the counter-intuitive step if you want real and lasting freedom from procrastination.
Ask me why.
It’s because that is where your opportunity to earn precious self-esteem lies hidden!